Sometimes he really does surprise me...

Last week Ammon and I watched the movie 'Fireproof.' It was incredible. It made us really look at our marriage and it gave us more of a drive to try harder. So for Valentine's Day, I got a package. It was flowers delivered with a vase. In my crochet box, there was a large heart shaped box of chocolate and a pearl necklace, bracelet and earring set that I had been wanting for quite some time but would never buy.
I was at a loss however, because I couldn't think of anything to get Ammon that would mean as much to him as doing all that did to me. So, I talked to a friend, and she suggested a candlelight dinner with all his favorite foods. I rushed out to the store, kids in tow, and bought what I needed. While we were there, Aidan asked if he would be at the candlelight dinner too and I told him yes, since he would be at the house. After a while, he came to me and said, "How about Ryan and I just eat a regular dinner in the other room." Alright, any particular reason? "Well, I don't want to ruin your dinner, with Ryan crying and stuff, so we'll leave you too alone." I was shocked. Ryan does cry every night at dinner because he hates dinner and doesn't see why he should have to eat meals rather than graze on snacks and chocolate milk. But the fact that Aidan wanted us to have a nice dinner without the chaos that typically accompanies mealtime in our home was very touching.
And for the kicker. During the dinner, I found out that Ammon bought everything for me over two weeks ago. The movie had nothing to do with it. I felt very loved and special. I'm incredibly blessed.

Eight Years and Counting...

As of February 2nd, Ammon and I have been married for eight years. On one hand that seems like a very long time and on the other I can't believe it's been that long. In that time we have moved 3 times, had 3 children and had 3 jobs, plus part time National Guard. We bought our first house and have seen our oldest child start school. In that time we've also learned that kids change how you view the entire world, including your spouse. We've learned that housework is not all the wife's responsibility. Ammon is a speed demon at folding and putting away laundry...except socks. He won't ever sort socks, so I do that and he does the rest. And just as we've learned that sometimes men do housework, sometimes women have to take the boys fishing. Yes, I fish. Ammon does not. He did agree to take the kids one day with some friends of ours and when one of them caught a fish, he said, "O.K. honey." It took me a minute to realize that he needed me to take the fish off the hook because it just feels too gross. Yes, he'll stick his hand down a toilet, but won't touch a fish. And so I fish, he does laundry. Yet another lesson learned is that no one person should ever be in charge of the family finances. That's a team effort. We started out with me doing it all, then I handed it off to Ammon after Ryan was born. This year we learned that budgeting together is not only sensible from a financial standpoint, but it is good for the relationship. It keeps us on the same page and no one has to wonder if an impromptu purchase is going to cause a crisis or a fight. We both know ahead of time how much we are working with. We also talk about things we'd like to save up for and that opens the door for many surprising and wonderful conversations. Last, but certainly not least, our roles as parents have drawn us closer as a couple and made us put life into a much larger perspective. We are always changing and growing alongside our kids as they go through each new phase of life. That creates a very strong bond between a couple, one that we plan to keep intact eternally.